The Greatest Weight of All

You think
it's not that bad
You think
you're not that big
You think
you can ignore the whispers and jokes from students
You think
it's all just fine until

It's a struggle
to get out of the car
It's a struggle 
to dry yourself after a shower
It's a struggle
to walk down 3 bloody stairs
It's a struggle 
to drag your sorry lard-ass around

You imagine
people staring at you
You imagine
laughing at you
You imagine
people are disgusted by your mere presence
You imagine
being invisible

You try
to motivate your self
You try
to stay positive
You try
to ignore everything
You try
not to cry all the time - like you want to

You believe
that losing weight will liberate you
You believe
there is only one way forward
You believe 
something has to change or you will die
You believe
your life is about to turn around

You say
"this is it"
You say
"the rest of my life"
You say
"turning point"
You say
what you want others to say to you

I will
overcome
I will
change
I will 
grow
I will
LIVE.